My Lame Life

My Lame Life Author Jen Mann
ISBN-10 9780988408081
Release 2017-04-17
Pages 258
Download Link Click Here

New York Times bestselling author Jen Mann has written a funny and heartwarming story for fans of Meg Cabot and Rainbow Rowell. My name is Plum Parrish, I’m fourteen, and I’m pretty sure I’m invisible. Not like super power invisible, more like loser invisible. There’s a big difference. I live with my dad who doesn’t realize that a job transfer to Kansas is not a promotion; my s’mother who thinks journaling, cheesy inspo slogans, and mani-pedis can solve my problems; and my twin brother Pax who is so perfect I’m convinced we share absolutely no DNA. Unfortunately, I’m not invisible to them. I love them, but they embarrass me on the daily. Honestly, they would probably say the same about me, because I’m weird, sarcastic, and just a lot. My best friend is ghosting me, and my other best friend is a teacher. The move to Kansas is my opportunity to reinvent myself and embrace my a lot-ness (yes, that is too a word). Sure, I will literally have to battle a live bat, a Queen Bee, and my unruly hair, but I will find my tribe and own who I am.



But Did You Die

But Did You Die Author Jen Mann
ISBN-10 9781944123031
Release 2017-06-11
Pages 240
Download Link Click Here

But Did You Die? is fifth hilarious installment in the New York Time bestselling I Just Want to Pee Alone series. But Did You Die? is a collection of terrible (but also kind of good) parenting advice from some of the funniest moms and dads on the ‘net. And that one super helpful childless friend we all have who loves to tell us we’re parenting wrong. Put your kids in front of the TV and let them eat junk while you read this book and laugh your tail off. We set the bar low so you can feel better about your parenting skills. You’re welcome.



People I Want to Punch in the Throat

People I Want to Punch in the Throat Author Jen Mann
ISBN-10 9780345549983
Release 2014-09-09
Pages 224
Download Link Click Here

NATIONAL BESTSELLER A debut collection of witty, biting essays laced with a surprising warmth, from Jen Mann, the writer behind the popular blog People I Want to Punch in the Throat People I want to punch in the throat: • anyone who feels the need to bling her washer and dryer • humblebraggers • people who treat their pets like children Jen Mann doesn’t have a filter, which sometimes gets her in trouble with her neighbors, her fellow PTA moms, and that one woman who tried to sell her sex toys at a home shopping party. Known for her hilariously acerbic observations on her blog, People I Want to Punch in the Throat, Mann now brings her sharp wit to bear on suburban life, marriage, and motherhood in this laugh-out-loud collection of essays. From the politics of joining a play group, to the thrill of mothers’ night out at the gun range, to the rewards of your most meaningful relationship (the one you have with your cleaning lady), nothing is sacred or off-limits. So the next time you find yourself wearing fuzzy bunny pajamas in the school carpool line or accidentally stuck at a co-worker’s swingers party, just think, What would Jen Mann do? Or better yet, buy her book. Advance praise for People I Want to Punch in the Throat “People I Want to Punch in the Throat is so good that it’ll make you want to adopt all the cats in the world. I’m not sure about the correlation, but it’s that good. It should come with a warning.”—Jenny Lawson, author of Let’s Pretend This Never Happened “Jen Mann has an amazing way of telling stories that will make you cringe and burst out laughing at the same time. From swinger parties to racist toddlers, she makes the suburbs unbelievably funny.”—Karen Alpert, author of I Heart My Little A-Holes “Jen Mann says the things we’re all too afraid to say. Her honest and hilarious writing style reminds me of David Sedaris and Tina Fey.”—Robin O’Bryant, author of Ketchup Is a Vegetable: And Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves “Jen Mann’s shrewd and unrelenting assault on the absurdity of suburban life is an honest peek into the occasional nightmare that is part of living the American dream. I love Jen. I wish she was my neighbor. It’s so refreshing to know that I’m not the only one who wants to punch almost everyone in the f***ing throat.”—Nicole Knepper, author of Moms Who Drink And Swear From the Trade Paperback edition.



The Queen of Bright and Shiny Things

The Queen of Bright and Shiny Things Author Ann Aguirre
ISBN-10 9781250078100
Release 2015-04-07
Pages 336
Download Link Click Here

Sage Czinski is trying really hard to be perfect. If she manages it, people won't peer beyond the surface, or ask hard questions about her past. She's learned to substitute causes for relationships, and it's working just fine . . . until Shane Cavendish strolls into her math class. He's a little antisocial, a lot beautiful, and everything she never knew she always wanted. Shane Cavendish just wants to be left alone to play guitar and work on his music. He's got heartbreak and loneliness in his rearview mirror, and this new school represents his last chance. He doesn't expect to be happy; he only wants to graduate and move on. He never counted on a girl like Sage. But love doesn't mend all broken things, and sometimes life has to fall apart before it can be put back together again. . . .



I Still Just Want to Pee Alone

I Still Just Want to Pee Alone Author Jen Mann
ISBN-10 0988408066
Release 2015-03-12
Pages 196
Download Link Click Here

I STILL Just Want to Pee Alone (Pee Alone #3) Don't miss the third book in this bestselling series! Motherhood is STILL the toughest - and STILL the funniest - job you'll ever love. We know that raising kids is hard work. The pay sucks, your boss is a tyrant, and the working conditions are pitiful - TGIF means nothing to a mother! You said it before and you're saying it again, "I STILL just want to pee alone!" I STILL Just Want to Pee Alone is ANOTHER collection of hilarious and heartwarming essays from 40 MORE of the most kick ass mom bloggers on the web. Including: People I Want to Punch in the Throat, Bad Parenting Moments, Let Me Start By Saying, and The Sh*tastrophy. Find essays like: It's Not Pee. It's You. Open Letter to My Daughter: My Mother was Right and You Should Think I Am, Too. And Then God Laughed Flames, Knives, and Fear: A Family Dinner Let's Piss Off the Babies This is Volume 3 of The Pee Alone series.



Working with People I Want to Punch in the Throat

Working with People I Want to Punch in the Throat Author Jen Mann
ISBN-10 9781944123055
Release 2017-09-12
Pages 244
Download Link Click Here

If you’ve ever toiled away in a cubicle or sat through the third meeting your boss scheduled to plan another meeting, then you can relate to this book. This is the third book in Jen Mann’s New York Times best-selling People I Want to Punch in the Throat series and it will not disappoint! This is the book you’ll want to accidentally on purpose leave on the desk of that blowhard in marketing. This is the book you’ll just happen to drop next the microwave in the break room hoping that Jan in accounting reads it before she reheats last night’s smelly leftovers for lunch. This is the book you’ll mail anonymously to your micromanaging boss with certain passages highlighted. The Punch List: Company-wide happy hours. I barely want to work with you. I definitely don’t want to have a beer with you. The Ivy Leaguers. You do know every sentence doesn’t have to start with, “When I was at Princeton…”? The martyrs. You get sick days—use one. Stop dragging your sniffling, snorting, coughing, sneezing ass to work and infecting the rest of us. You’re not that important. Advance Praise for Working with People I Want to Punch in the Throat: “I’m grateful to all of the people Jen Mann writes about in this book—the condescending managers, undermining editors, the plastic surgeon who helpfully offered free operations during a job interview, and the boss who fired her with a Post-It Note—because they made her into the rage-filled writer we all know and love.” - Jancee Dunn, author of How Not to Hate Your Husband After Kids “I connected with Jen Mann’s book more deeply than I’m comfortable with. It was brilliant and gross and hilarious and heartwarming and then hilarious again. I literally couldn’t put it down. For what it’s worth, the only book before this one that I read in one sitting without a break was Dances with Wolves. Don’t judge me.” - James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn), author of Only Dead on the Inside: A Parent’s Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse



The Queen s Governess

The Queen s Governess Author Karen Harper
ISBN-10 9781446458648
Release 2011-08-04
Pages 384
Download Link Click Here

'I could not fathom they were going to kill the queen. Nor could I bear to witness Anne Boleyn's beheading...' As a favour to a doomed queen, Kat Ashley agrees to become governess and confidante to the young Elizabeth Tudor. Together they suffer bitter exile, assassination attempts, and imprisonment, barely escaping with their reputations and their lives intact. But when Elizabeth is eventually crowned, Kat continues to serve her, faithfully guarding all of the queen's secrets, even the one that could bring down the monarchy...



Dumplin

Dumplin Author Julie Murphy
ISBN-10 9780857979940
Release 2015-09-16
Pages 336
Download Link Click Here

Willdowdean is fat. But she's OK with that. Willowdean reckons the best thing to do with a bikini is to wear it. Her mother organises the annual town beauty pageant, and fondly calls her daughter Dumplin'. Willow's OK with all that too, but when love comes to call, and best friends start to change, then suddenly Willow isn't quite as okay with everything, so how is she going to deal with these new challenges? And when is she going to get another kiss like THAT one, again?



You re Never Weird on the Internet Almost

You re Never Weird on the Internet  Almost Author Felicia Day
ISBN-10 9781476785677
Release 2015-08-11
Pages 272
Download Link Click Here

The instant New York Times bestseller from “queen of the geeks” Felicia Day, You’re Never Weird on the Internet (Almost) is a “relentlessly funny and surprisingly inspirational” (Forbes.com) memoir about her unusual upbringing, her rise to internet stardom, and embracing her weirdness to find her place in the world. When Felicia Day was a girl, all she wanted was to connect with other kids (desperately). Growing up in the Deep South, where she was “home-schooled for hippie reasons,” she looked online to find her tribe. The Internet was in its infancy and she became an early adopter at every stage of its growth—finding joy and unlikely friendships in the emerging digital world. Her relative isolation meant that she could pursue passions like gaming, calculus, and 1930’s detective novels without shame. Because she had no idea how “uncool” she really was. But if it hadn’t been for her strange background—the awkwardness continued when she started college at sixteen, with Mom driving her to campus every day—she might never have had the naïve confidence to forge her own path. Like when she graduated as valedictorian with a math degree and then headed to Hollywood to pursue a career in acting despite having zero contacts. Or when she tired of being typecast as the crazy cat-lady secretary and decided to create her own web series before people in show business understood that online video could be more than just cats chasing laser pointers. Felicia’s rags-to-riches rise to Internet fame launched her career as one of the most influen­tial creators in new media. Ever candid, she opens up about the rough patches along the way, recounting battles with writer’s block, a full-blown gaming addiction, severe anxiety, and depression—and how she reinvented herself when overachieving became overwhelming. Showcasing Felicia’s “engaging and often hilarious voice” (USA TODAY), You’re Never Weird on the Internet (Almost) is proof that everyone should celebrate what makes them different and be brave enough to share it with the world, because anything is possible now—even for a digital misfit.



Half a King

Half a King Author Joe Abercrombie
ISBN-10 9780804178334
Release 2014-07-15
Pages 352
Download Link Click Here

NAMED ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR BY TIME AND THE WASHINGTON POST • LOCUS AWARD WINNER “The Shattered Seas trilogy has worked its way into a very exclusive group of my favorite fantasy novels of all time.”—James Dashner, #1 New York Times bestselling author of The Maze Runner “A fast-paced tale of betrayal and revenge that grabbed me from page 1 and refused to let go.”—George R. R. Martin “I swore an oath to avenge the death of my father. I may be half a man, but I swore a whole oath.” Prince Yarvi has vowed to regain a throne he never wanted. But first he must survive cruelty, chains, and the bitter waters of the Shattered Sea. And he must do it all with only one good hand. The deceived will become the deceiver. Born a weakling in the eyes of his father, Yarvi is alone in a world where a strong arm and a cold heart rule. He cannot grip a shield or swing an axe, so he must sharpen his mind to a deadly edge. The betrayed will become the betrayer. Gathering a strange fellowship of the outcast and the lost, he finds they can do more to help him become the man he needs to be than any court of nobles could. Will the usurped become the usurper? But even with loyal friends at his side, Yarvi finds that his path may end as it began—in twists, and traps, and tragedy. BONUS: This edition includes an excerpt from Joe Abercrombie’s Half the World. “Tremendously entertaining . . . lightning-fast and filled with a wonderful collection of rogues, villains and two-faced bastards . . . From the first chapter [Joe Abercrombie] wastes no time as the reader is swept up in a gripping tale of betrayal and revenge.”—SciFi Now “Once this plot has its teeth in you, it will not let go. . . . Abercrombie’s masterful storytelling means that everything, from the characters that you come to love and despise, to the sprawling world that is explored, is enthralling.”—Fantasy Book Review “Abercrombie’s Shattered Sea is a fantastic yet believable backdrop to Yarvi’s struggle, a vivid imaginary land.”—The Seattle Times “Intriguing characters . . . nonstop action.”—Chicago Tribune “Half a King is my favorite book by Joe Abercrombie so far, and that’s saying something.”—Patrick Rothfuss “As in all Abercrombie’s books, friends turn out to be enemies, enemies turn out to be friends; the line between good and evil is murky indeed; and nothing goes quite as we expect. With eye-popping plot twists and rollicking good action, Half a King is definitely a full adventure.”—Rick Riordan “Enthralling! An up-all-night read.”—Robin Hobb “Polished and sharp, perhaps his most technically proficient novel yet . . . I dare you to read the first chapter and try not to turn the next page.”—Brent Weeks “Half a King can be summed up in a single word: masterpiece. It’s a coming-of-age story. It’s a Viking saga. It’s a revenge tale and family drama and the return of the prodigal son. But most of all, it’s this: a short time alongside people as weak and blundering as we are and, in the midst of it all, as heroic. Far too short a time, as it turns out. What a wonderful book.”—Myke Cole “Half a King is full of all the adventure I’ve come to expect from Abercrombie and a tenderness I never knew he had.”—Sam Sykes



The Mommy Shorts Guide to Remarkably Average Parenting

The Mommy Shorts Guide to Remarkably Average Parenting Author Ilana Wiles
ISBN-10 9781613123287
Release 2016-09-27
Pages 224
Download Link Click Here

Ilana Wiles is not a good mother. She’s not a bad mother either. Like most of us, she’s normal. From the creator of the wildly popular blog Mommy Shorts comes Ilana Wiles’s first humor book on remarkably average parenting. If you want solid advice about raising kids, this book is not for you. If you want to wallow in your own misery about how having kids is AWFUL, this book is not for you. This book pays homage to the every-parent and suggests that they are the people having the best child-rearing experience of all. Using Wiles’s signature infographics and photographs to illustrate her personal and hilarious essays on motherhood, the book is an honest guide that celebrates the fun of being a mom.



Going Geek

Going Geek Author Charlotte Huang
ISBN-10 9780553539455
Release 2016-09-13
Pages 288
Download Link Click Here

A girl returns to her exclusive east coast boarding school and finds that she's no longer one of the cool kids on campus in this second novel from the author of For the Record. It wasn’t supposed to be this way. Skylar Hoffman’s senior year at her preppy East Coast boarding school should have been perfect: amazing boyfriend the coolest friends the most desirable dorm But it’s far from it. To her dismay, Skylar’s not going to rule senior year because she’s stuck in Abbot House, a tiny dorm known for, well, nothing. Living with a group of strangers everyone thinks is lame is bad enough. Worse is that Skylar wasn’t exactly truthful about how she spent summer break in Los Angeles—and her little white lie is causing her once rock-solid romance to crumble fast. And when it turns out that Skylar’s best friend is the one responsible for having her booted from Lincoln? It’s an all-out war. Stepping out of her comfort zone never felt so scary—or necessary. But everything is different now. Including, maybe, Skylar herself . . . *** "A love letter--brimming with heart, soul, and wit--to everyone who's ever felt left behind . . . perfect for fans of Stephanie Perkins and Rainbow Rowell." --Jeff Zentner, author of The Serpent King From the Hardcover edition.



Hairstyles of the Damned

Hairstyles of the Damned Author Joe Meno
ISBN-10 9781936070299
Release 2004-09-01
Pages 278
Download Link Click Here

Included in MTV.com's "These 17 Music-Themed YA Books Could Be Your Life" A selection of the Barnes & Noble Discover Great New Writers Program. "Meno gives his proverbial coming-of-age tale a punk-rock edge, as seventeen-year-old Chicagoan Brian Oswald tries to land his first girlfriend...Meno ably explores Brian's emotional uncertainty and his poignant youthful search for meaning...His gabby, heartfelt, and utterly believable take on adolescence strikes a winning chord." --Publishers Weekly "A funny, hard-rocking first-person tale of teenage angst and discovery." --Booklist "Captures the loose, fun, recklessness of midwestern punk." --MTV.com "Captures both the sweetness and sting of adolescence with unflinching honesty." --Entertainment Weekly "Joe Meno writes with the energy, honesty, and emotional impact of the best punk rock. From the opening sentence to the very last word, Hairstyles of the Damned held me in his grip." --Jim DeRogatis, pop music critic, Chicago Sun-Times "The most authentic young voice since J.D. Salinger's Holden Caulfield...A darn good book." --Daily Southtown "Sensitive, well-observed, often laugh-out-loud funny...You won't regret a moment of the journey." --Chicago Tribune "Meno is a romantic at heart. Not the greeting card kind, or the Harlequin paperback version, but the type who thinks, deep down, that things matter, that art can change lives." --Elgin Courier News "Funny and charming and sad and real. The adults are sparingly yet poignantly drawn, especially the fathers, who slip through without saying much but make a profound impression." --Chicago Journal "Underneath his angst, Brian, the narrator of Hairstyles of the Damned, possesses a disarming sense of compassion which allows him to worm his way into the reader's heart. It is this simple contradiction that makes Meno's portrait of adolescence so convincing: He has dug up and displayed for us the secret paradox of the teenage years, the desire to belong pitted against the need for individuality--a constant clash of hate and love." --NewPages.com "Joe Meno knows Chicago's south side the way Jane Goodall knew chimps and apes--which is to say, he really knows it. He also knows about the early '90s, punk rock, and awkward adolescence. Best of all, he knows the value of entertainment. Hairstyles of the Damned is proof positive." --John McNally, author of The Book of Ralph "Filled with references to dozens of bands and mix-tape set lists, the book's heart and soul is driven by a teenager's life-changing discovery of punk's social and political message...Meno's alter ego, Brian Oswald, is a modern-day Holden Caulfield...It's a funny, sweet, and, at times, hard-hitting story with a punk vibe." --Mary Houlihan, Chicago Sun-Times "Meno's language is rhythmic and honest, expressing things proper English never could. And you've got to hand it to the author, who pulled off a very good trick: The book is punk rock. It's not just punk rock. It's not just about punk rock; it embodies the idea of punk rock; it embodies the idea of punk--it's pissed off at authority, it won't groom itself properly, and it irritates. Yet its rebellious spirit is inspiring and right on the mark." --SF Weekly Hairstyles of the Damned is the debut novel of our Punk Planet Books imprint, which originates from Punk Planet magazine. Hairstyles of the Damned is an honest, true-life depiction of growing up punk on Chicago's south side: a study in the demons of racial intolerance, Catholic school conformism, and class repression. It is the story of the riotous exploits of Brian, a high school burnout, and his best friend, Gretchen, a punk rock girl fond of brawling. Based on the actual events surrounding a Chicago high school's segregated prom, this work of fiction unflinchingly pursues the truth in discovering what it means to be your own person.



Stories I d Tell in Bars

Stories I d Tell in Bars Author Jen Lancaster
ISBN-10 9781537870397
Release 2017-07-25
Pages 333
Download Link Click Here

Unfiltered. Unsupervised. Unapologetic. Older - but arguably not wiser - Lancaster gets back to basics in this hilarious essay collection about everything from taking community policing classes to accidentally getting stoned with the waiter after a fancy dinner. These are the tales she’d tell if she met you in a bar... if she weren’t too lazy to put on pants and go to a bar. Offering advice ranging from how to remain happily married to a man who refuses to blow his damn nose already to not creating An Incident at the cheese counter during an attempt at Whole30, she’s you, only louder. As she details the chaos that will surely ensue if she has to learn one more television remote control, you’ll want to settle in and pour yourself a tall one. Because what’s more fun than hearing a friend share her favorite stories?



My Life

My Life Author Serena Williams
ISBN-10 1847396453
Release 2010-05-21
Pages 257
Download Link Click Here

One of the biggest stars in tennis, Serena Williams has captured every major title. From growing up in the tough neighborhood of Compton, California, to being trained by her father on courts littered with broken glass and drug paraphernalia, to becoming the top women's player in the world, Serena has proven to be an inspiration to her legions of fans. Her accomplishments have not been won without struggle. She has been derailed by injury, criticized for her unorthodox approach to tennis, and was devastated by the tragic shooting of her older sister. Yet somehow Serena always manages to prevail, both on and off the court. She's applied the same strength and determination that helped her to become a champion to her successful pursuits in philanthropy, fashion, television, and film. In this compelling and poignant memoir, Serena takes an empowering look at her extraordinary life and what is still to come.



Don t Get Caught

Don t Get Caught Author Kurt Dinan
ISBN-10 9781492630159
Release 2016-04-01
Pages 336
Download Link Click Here

10:00 tonight at the water tower. Tell no one. -Chaos Club When Max receives a mysterious invite from the untraceable, epic prank-pulling Chaos Club, he has to ask: why him? After all, he's Mr. 2.5 GPA, Mr. No Social Life. He's Just Max. And his favorite heist movies have taught him this situation calls for Rule #4: Be suspicious. But it's also his one shot to leave Just Max in the dust... Yeah, not so much. Max and four fellow students-who also received invites-are standing on the newly defaced water tower when campus security "catches" them. Definitely a setup. And this time, Max has had enough. It's time for Rule #7: Always get payback. Let the prank war begin. Oceans 11 meets The Breakfast Club in this entertaining, fast-paced debut filled with pranks and cons that will keep readers on their toes, never sure who's pulling the strings or what's coming next.



Dear Stephanie

Dear Stephanie Author Mandi Castle
ISBN-10 0996317503
Release 2015-05-08
Pages 290
Download Link Click Here

Paige Preston wants to end her life. After an unsuccessful attempt, she lands herself in mandatory therapy with a sexy psychiatrist. When he and an even more alluring friend begin to help her break down the walls she's spent a lifetime building, Paige begins to see something bigger than herself. Is it enough to pull her out of her dark world and help her finally feel like a human? Or will letting someone in be the final step toward her demise? Dear Stephanie is a sinfully addictive walk through a world of beauty, affluence, and incidental love that effortlessly moves the reader between laughter, tears, heartache, and hope with the turn of every "Paige."